Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Drilling Down Notes 11.08.2009

Here are my thoughts/notes as I drill down from Sunday's message-

1. List three goals you have for you life (and your family) as of today. Have these always been your goal? What has helped or hindered you accomplishing your goals? Discuss.
  • Wow, that's a big question. Three goals for my family/future would be 1) become self employed, with the option to work outside the home 2) own and operate a self sustaining ranch and farm with a BIG beautiful home on the land 3) LIVE like no one else (after we live like no one else). These haven't always been my goals, the ranch has beenmainly just since married. Although, I have kinda always wanted to be self empolyed some how, and to live like no one else. I am just not convinced the "normal" is what really God has in store for me. Well, with large scale of my goals not much seem to help - and all are hindered greatly by money and time. (11.11.2009)

2. According to Romans 8:28-30 and Romans 12:1-2, what is God's goal for your life? Are you letting God accomplish His goal in and through you? Why or why not?

  • God's plan is to make us more like Christ, so that we can be justified and gloried through Him. And to be transformed being able to discern His will. I am trying to let God accomplish this through me, although I know my pig headed stubbornness and fear gets in the way a lot of the times. But I am and will continue to study His word, hoping to be more like Christ. (11.11.2009)

3. Read Phil. 3:7-10 what did Paul and what do we have to be willing to do in order for God to continue and ultimately complete His work in us? Read Phil. 3:20-21, 1 John 3:2 and John 10:10, when will this goal be fully realized and what does this mean for us today?

  • We have to give everything up to the Lord. We have to not stand on our own with the law, but with Christ in grace. Let Him have control. This goal won't be fully realized until we are in Heaven, and truely like Christ. It means that we can live now, and live abundantly. (11.11.2009)

4. We are to live by faith (Gal 2:20, Heb 11:6) What does living by faith look like to you? How are we to view God as we live by faith (Ps 66:5, Isaiah 55:8)? Read Acts 22:10-15. How did God ask Paul to live by faith?

  • To be answered 11.12

5. Read 2Corinthians 3:16-18. What do these verses suggest about God's transformation process in your life? Read 2Corinth 3:5-6. What brings and sustains life? How do we translate this principle into how we live?

  • To be answered 11.13

6. As we wrap up the Out of Control series and Be Transformed Life Group material, what have you learned? How has god impacted your life? What has changed? Discuss.

  • To be answered 11.14

If you are interstested in the sermon that this is drilling down from - go to northmetrochurch.org and click the podcast link, this was week 9 of Out of Control.

Drilling Down From Sunday

These are my message notes from Sunday's (11.08.2009) sermon on 2 Corinthians 3:16-18. They won't make much sence, but I just want a place to "store" these thoughts. :)

Out of Control: Week 9 - Be Transformed
Three closing thoughts on living life Out of Control...

1. The Goal of life is Christ-likeness. (Romans 8:29)
  • know and share
  • sucess isn't only by progress/increase
  • God's work in us & thoughts
  • doesn't fit on a stat sheet
  • become a better you with Jesus - the world doesn't need a better me.
  • Christ is life Col. 3:4
  • stop measuring everything
  • let God work through ALL OF YOU

2. The Way of life is faith. (Galations 2:20)

  • Ps 66:5-7, Ish 55: 8-9, Job
  • would knowing it all bring you peace? maybe that's why He doesn't show us yet!
  • ask, He'll answer in STEPS! (Paul) not whole view
  • Proverbs 16:9 - trust Him to lead your steps
  • it is harder for God to move a still heart than a moving heart

3. The Practice of life is preserverance. (2 Cor. 3:16-18)

  • We ARE being transformed
  • His work not our work
  • be unveiled - God's glory can be shown/ not covered up
  • can't feel transformation - same as prevention in health
  • Let go Jennifer, there is nothing you can do.

If you would like to listen to the message that these notes came from visit Northmetrochurch.org - there click the podcast link.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Can't seem to get a smile on



I just can't seem to "snap out of it" today - it's ridiculous, it's like I'm sad for something that hasn't even happened yet. I don't want to be sad. I don't want to be down. I've tried to walk around, sound happy when I answer the phone, but now that I am alone in the office, I feel like crying. I haven't yet, but feel like at any second at the drop of a hat, POW tears will be coming. :( *sniffle* Yes, there might be a lot to cry about, it's been a very hard couple of months to get my mind around, but I'm not even the one that is most effected in all of this, I feel stupid to be upset already, so soon. (again.)

We expect to say goodbye to Grandpa B with in the next few days. He's very weak, doesn't breath strongly anymore & hasn't opened his eyes today. I talked to Grandma B this morning, she's doing ok, but I think she's getting a bit more scared. That's fair, in fact more than fair. How do you say goodbye to someone that you've known and loved for 50 years?

With tears, I guess.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Tips, Tips & More Tips

For the longest time I've been looking for tips. Tips to improve this or that, tips to ease this or soothe that.... tips that work, some that don't. But today, I ran into a tip - that made me stop in my tracks. It came from Barbara Sher in her weekly audio tip - which normally I don't even listen to or read any more - just to busy for her tips. Anyhow, today I took the time to listen and it was very intersting that stirred inside me. She said that it's time to do my own thinking, and that my happiness counts. Wow, does it? If everyone else's happiness counts, I don't know why mine wouldn't. :)

My happiness counts. Not meaning that we get to just go out and do whatever we want to do, but that someone cares about me and what I am feeling. That I count. I matter & that it's worth being me, and not someone else.

I hope that you know that you count too! In fact, I hope that you are thinking, "Duh, Jenn, how did you know already know that?" rather than that wow that I just got - and if you don't fit either of those.... I hope you'll get "it" soon.

In Christ,
Jennifer

Friday, September 11, 2009

Personal vs. Professional? The two lives we lead.

Ran into this article today (directed from a church work related email.... )

What do you think? Should this be allowed? Would you stand for it - giving away your log ins and PASSWORDS to a "possible" employer??

I don't think I could.

It does make me wonder... should our employeers be in that much into our personal life? If not, does it feel like you two different people? one personal, one professional...

Curioiusly, at our (church work) staff lunch meeting we were talking about similar things. I have to be honest, I don't know if I like or want all of my co-workers & members of my church work on my facebook. It just makes me nervous, what if I say or write something, what if one of my friends says or writes something, that work doesn't agree with or like and it comes back to bite my job in the ass??

Maybe I am living two lives or maybe I just like seperation between work and play. However, I guess it does make you realize what image you are putting out to all of the people that you come in any contact with.

Friday, September 4, 2009

How about a good story... and a good cry?

To Whoever Gets My Dog

They told me the big black Lab's name was Reggie as I looked at him lying in his pen. The shelter was clean, and the people really friendly. I'd only been in the area for six months, but everywhere I went in the small college town, people were welcoming and open. Everyone waves when you pass them on the street.But something was still missing as I attempted to settle in to my new life here, and I thought a dog couldn't hurt. Give me someone to talk to.And I had just seen Reggie's advertisement on the local news. The shelter said they had received numerous calls right after, but they said the people who had come down to see him just didn't look like "Lab people," whatever that meant. They must've thought I did.But at first, I thought the shelter had misjudged me in giving me Reggie and his things, which consisted of a dog pad, bag of toys almost all of which were brand new tennis balls, his dishes, and a sealed letter from his previous owner. See, Reggie and I didn't really hit it off when we got home. We struggled for two weeks (which is how long the shelter told me to give him to adjust to his new home). Maybe it was the fact that I was trying to adjust, too. Maybe we were too much alike.For some reason, his stuff (except for the tennis balls - he wouldn't go anywhere without two stuffed in his mouth) got tossed in with all of my other unpacked boxes. I guess I didn't really think he'd need all his old stuff, that I'd get him new thing s once he settled in, but it became pretty clear pretty soon that he wasn't going to.I tried the normal commands the shelter told me he knew, ones like "sit" and "stay" and "come" and "heel," and he'd follow them - when he felt like it. He never really seemed to listen when I called his name - sure, he'd look in my direction after the fourth of fifth time I said it, but then he'd just go back to doing whatever. When I'd ask again, you could almost see him sigh and then grudgingly obey.This just wasn't going to work. He chewed a couple shoes and some unpacked boxes. I was a little too stern with him and he resented it, I could tell.The friction got so bad that I couldn't wait for the two weeks to be up, and when it was, I was in full-on search mode for my cell phone amid all of my unpacked stuff. I remembered leaving it on the stack of boxes for the guest room, but I also mumbled, rather cynically, that the "damn dog probably hid it on me."Finally I found it, but before I could punch up the shelter's number, I also found his pad and=2 0other toys from the shelter. I tossed the pad in Reggie's direction and he snuffed it and wagged, some of the most enthusiasm I'd seen since bringing him home. But then I called, "Hey, Reggie, you like that come here and I'll give you a treat." Instead, he sort of glanced in my direction - maybe "glared" is more accurate - and then gave a discontented sigh and flopped down. With his back to me.Well, that's not going to do it either, I thought. And I punched the shelter phone number.But I hung up when I saw the sealed envelope. I had completely forgotten about that, too."Okay, Reggie," I said out loud, "let's see if your previous owner has any advice...""To Whoever Gets My Dog:Well, I can't say that I'm happy you're reading this, a letter I told the shelter could only be opened by Reggie's new owner.I'm not even happy writing it. If you're reading this, it means I just got back from my last car ride with my Lab after dropping him off at the shelter. He knew something was different. I have packed up his pad and toys before and set them by the back door before a trip, but this time…it's like he knew something was wrong. And something is wrong...which is why I have to go to try to make it right.So let me tell you about my Lab in the hopes that it will help you bond with him and he with you.First, he loves tennis balls...the more the merri er. Sometimes I think he's part squirrel, the way he hordes them.He usually always has two in his mouth, and he tries to get a third in there. Hasn't done it yet.Doesn't matter where you throw them, he'll bound after it, so be careful - really don't do it by any roads. I made that mistake once, and it almost cost him dearly.Next, commands. Maybe the shelter staff already told you, but I'll go over them again: Reggie knows the obvious ones - "sit," "stay," "come," "heel." He knows hand signals: "back" to turn around and go back when you put your hand straight up; and "over" if you put your hand out right or left. "Shake" for shaking water off, and "paw" for a high-five. He does "down" when he feels like lying down - I bet you could work on that with him some more. He knows "ball" and "food" and "bone" and "treat" like nobody's business.I trained Reggie with small food treats. Nothing opens his ears like little pieces of hot dog.Feeding schedule: twice a day, once about seven in the morning, and again at six in the evening.Regular store-bought stuff; the shelter has the brand.He's up on his shots.Call the clinic on 9th Street and update his info with yours; they'll make sure to send you reminders for when he's due. Be forewarned: Reggie hates the vet. Good luck getting him in the car - I don't know how he knows when it's time to go to the vet, but he knows.Finally, give him some time.I've never been married, so it's only been Reggie and me for his whole life. He's gone everywhere with me, so please include him on your daily car rides if you can. He sits well in the backseat, and he doesn't bark or complain. He just loves to be around people, and me most especially.Which means that this transition is going to be hard, with him going to live with someone new. nd that's why I need to share one more bit of info with you...His name's not Reggie.I don't know what made me do it, but when I dropped him off at the shelter, I told them his name was Reggie. He's a smart dog, he'll get used to it and will respond to it, of that I have no doubt, but I just couldn't bear to give them his real name. For me to do that, it seemed so final, that handing him over to the shelter was as good as me admitting that I'd never see him again. And if I end up coming back, getting him, and tearing up this letter, it means everything's fine. But if someone else is reading it, well…well it means that his new owner should know his real name. It'll help you bond with him. Who knows, maybe you'll even notice a change in his demeanor if he's been giving you problems.His real name is Tank. Because that is what I drive.Again, if you're reading this and you 're from the area, maybe my name has been on the news. I told the shelter that they couldn't make "Reggie" available for adoption until they received word from my company commander. See, my parents are gone, I have no siblings, no one I could've left Tank with...and it was my only real request of the Army upon my deployment to Iraq, that they make one phone call the shelter...in the "event"...to tell them that Tank could be put up for adoption. Luckily, my colonel is a dog guy, too, and he knew where my platoon was headed. He said he'd do it personally. And if you're reading this, then he made good on his word.Well, this letter is getting to downright depressing, even though, frankly, I'm just writing it for my dog. I couldn't imagine if I was writing it for a wife and kids and family, but still, Tank has been my family for the last six years, almost as long as the Army has been my family.And now I hope and pray that you make him part of your family and that he will adjust and come to love you the same way he loved me.That unconditional love from a dog is what I took with me to Iraq as an inspiration to do something selfless, to protect innocent people from those who would do terrible things...and to keep those terrible people from coming over here. If I had to give up Tank in order to do it, I am glad to have done so. He was my example of service and of love. I hope I honored him by my service to my country and comrades.<> All right, that's enough.I deploy this evening and have to drop this letter off at the shelter.I don't think I'll say another good-bye to Tank, though. I cried too much the first time. Maybe I'll peek in on him and see if he finally got that third tennis ball in his mouth.Good luck with Tank.Give him a good home, and give him an extra kiss goodnight - every night - from me.Thank you, Paul Mallory”I folded the letter and slipped it back in the envelope. Sure I had heard of Paul Mallory, everyone in town knew him, even new people like me. Local kid, killed in Iraq a few months ago and posthumously earning the Silver Star when he gave his life to save three buddies. Flags had been at half-mast all summer.I leaned forward in my chair and rested my elbows on my knees, staring at the dog."Hey, Tank," I said quietly.The dog's head whipped up, his ears cocked and his eyes bright. "C'mere boy."He was instantly on his feet, his nails clicking on the hardwood floor. He sat in front of me, his head tilted, searching for the name he hadn't heard in months."Tank," I whispered. His tail swished.I kept whispering his name, over and over, and each time, his ears lowered, his eyes softened, and his posture relaxed as a wave of contentment just seemed to flood him. I stroked his ears, rubbed his shoulders, buried my face into20his scruff and hugged him."It's me now, Tank, just you and me. Your old pal gave you to me." Tank reached up and licked my cheek. "So whatdaya say we play some ball? His ears perked again."Yeah Ball, you like that Ball."Tank tore from my hands and disappeared in the next room. And when he came back...he had three tennis balls in his mouth.

Passed on by a mom, whose son is in Iraq.

Ps. Yes It make me cry at my desk. Jenn

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

So would you like me to buy you a new car??

Well, forget it!
Besides the Cash for Clunkers is almost out of money anyhow.

Check this out - heard from it on Klove
http://klove.com/News/
http://www.wikio.com/video/1484057

Thoughts?

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Today's Game: Let's Confuse the Doctors

It's been a fun the last month, with David in and out of the doctors' offices, I had a small glimpse of the life a few friends have had. We are so glad now to have it figured out! * well kinda. *

David has a rare bacterial infection and everything about him getting sick hasn't made sense. A fever being his only sysmptom, it was pretty hard to track down what was truely going on in his body. Blood tests, blood tests and more blood tests - possible cat scan and even a ultra sound for a follow-up... This type of bacteria isn't normally in humans or in the States! Europe more likely, but it sounds like this area hasn't seen it in decades. Brucella is normally contracted through consuming non paturized dariy products or coming in contact with birthing cows. All cows now are vacinated for it here in the states, so it keeps the cases to "very rare". David doesn't eat or drink any kinda "weird milk" (his words, not mine) - unless we've been suckered into something at a restraunt or something....

Anyhow, normally it's animal/human contact, but unfortunately, you can also pass it sexually, althought again the possibility is very rare. :) So, not taking the risks of not knowing, today I went to my doctor to ask for the test - they were confused, it was funny.
The conversation and appointment went something like this:
"Hi, I need to come in for a blood draw for a bacterial Brucella test"
"A what test?"
"Brucella."
"How do you spell that?"
" I don't know... Bruce - ella? or Bruce-ella-ousiousousius?"
"It's a blood test?"
"Yeah, for a bacteria called Brucella."
"Ok?" .... long silence
"Yes, I know this isn't a normal test, yes you can call me back."

Hours later I get the call to come in and take the test.
"You are here for a what test?"
*sigh* After a few more moments, we are back on the same page, I sit for about 5 minutes (kinda a miricle in itself!) and the go back when my name is called.
(Side note: Why did they weigh me? All I wanted to do was give them some blood... agh!) :) anyhow I did get a laugh when I heard the tech ask someone what tube to use, seemed fitting because when David was in for one of his many blood tests - they had to look up a few different tubes for specific tests as well, at least I know my doc will run the same tests.... Then after my blood donation and they said they would call me in a few days, the doctor caught me in the hallway -
"So, you wanted us to test for Brucella?"
"Yep, that's right."
"It's not normally a test we run, why?"
*sigh* "Yep, I know it's really rare in the states, but my husband has it."
"Oh!" part excitment, part shock flashed in his face. "A confirmed case?"
"Yep, confirmed, he's been on antibiatics for about 4 weeks now, his latest blood test last week, shows he still has it."
"Oh! but you can't get it from him." He stated as a half question.
"Well, the CDC says that I can, so I figured it would be best to be tested."
"Oh! wow...." the conversation went on like this for a minute or so, his questions and my 1/2 answers really only being what I've read online or heard from David's doctor. Guess they will call me in a few days.... I wonder if I have it, if we'll be able to pin point where we got it from?


Now, I don't mean to sound like I am knocking my doctors, they are fine - my point is that David somehow got some crap that practically anyone under like 60 hasn't heard of.... and where??? where did he get it?? and now do I have it as well??

On the Right Path

http://motivatethyself.com/constant-reflection-provides-pinpoint-accuracy/

Worth reading! Spoke very strongly to me.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Amazing! Hi-larious!

http://consumerist.com/5314246/unruly-teen-charges-23-quadrillion-at-drugstore

Check it out- glad to see someone's in more debt than I am. Don't forget to check out some of the comments, they are hi-larious! :)

Creepy Crawlies


What is with with the spiders lately? In the past few days, I've seen an extra abundance of eight legged creatures. Understand abundance means any more than zero! But 3 in one day, today already one - last few days at least one or two, in the house, in my office at work.... jesh!


A long time ago, an old friend of mine once told me that spiders are believed to be messengers in some Native American tribes. I wonder what message I am not getting when I wash them down the drain??? Or request David to "take care of it"??? Maybe next time I'll try to talk to the spider, giving it a chance to give me it's message & then tell it to get out of my space in a hurry!


There's a Spider in My Bathtub intresting link about house spiders - kinda like the ones I've been finding.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Email: A Soldier responds to MJ's Death

I recieved this email today & real or not - it makes a valid point. And I want to again thank those that are/have and will continue to fight and stand for my freedom!! Thank you, I love you!

Email received from friend 7/14/2009
This is written by a young man serving his third tour of duty in Iraq.
You might find his take on Michael Jackson interesting.

I was just watching the news, and I caught part of a report on Michael
Jackson. As we all know, Jackson died the other day. He was an
Entertainerwho performed for decades. He made millions, he spent
Millions, and he did a lot of things that make him a villain to many
People. I understand that his death would affect a lot of people, and
I respect those who mourn his death, but that isn't the point.

Why is it that when ONE man dies, the whole of America loses their
Minds with grief. When a man dies whose only contribution to the
Country was to ENTERTAIN people, the Amercian people find the need to
Flock to a memorial and even Congress sees the need to
Hold a "moment of silence" for his passing?

Am I missing something here? ONE man dies, and all of a sudden he's a
Freaking martyr because he entertained us for a few decades? What
About all those SOLDIERS who have died to give us freedom? All those
Soldiers who, knowing that they would be asked to fight in a war,
Still raised their hands and swore to defend the Constitution and the
United States of America. Where is their moment of silence? Where
Arethe people flocking to their graves or memorials and mourning over
Them because they made the ultimate sacrifice? Why is it when a
Soldier dies, there are more people saying "good riddence," and "thank
God for IEDs?" When did this country become so calloused to the
Sacrificeof GOOD MEN and WOMEN, that they can arbitrarily blow off
Their deaths, and instead, throw themselves into mourning for a "Pop
Icon?"

I think that if they are going to hold a moment of silence IN CONGRESS
For Michael Jackson, they need to hold a moment of silence for every
Service member killed in Iraq and Afghanistan. They need to PUBLICLY
Recognize every life that has been lost so that the American people
Can live their callous little lives in the luxury and freedom that WE,
Those that are living and those that have gone on, have provided for
Them But, wait, that would take too much time, because there have  
Been so many willing to make that sacrifice. After all, we will never
Make  millions of dollars. We will never star in movies, or write hit
Songs that the world will listen too. We only shed our blood, sweat
And tears so that people can enjoy what they have.

Sorry if I have offended, but I needed to say it.  Remember these five 
 words the next time you think of someone who is serving in the military;

"So that others may live..."

Isaac


















IN GOD WE TRUST



Why Me???




Thursday, June 25, 2009

I had a Dream!

Ok, so last night/this morning I had a pretty crazy dream - I don't remember everything & it just shows me that I should have written it down, when I woke up - to make sure my details were right.
What I do remember is spotted; we were setting up a camping trip with family and friends. Some friends and I rented a cabin, and were bouncing through it putting stuff away - until we found a polar bear hiding under my bed. The polar bear was cute and loveable, but we were scared becuase we didn't want the smell to attact other bears. Then when it ran out of the cabin from a whole in the drywall - we were really worried, knowing that his mommy would be looking for him. We were all very scared & paniced on what to do - then somehow we locked the brown mommy bear into another room of the cabin & when she was sleeping, we snuck past so we could get our stuff and get ready for church. There was some kinda of car accedient on the way to church & I was trying to call Dad (back at the cabin with the bear) not to open one of the doors, because we found out she was locked in a different room than before. By the time we got back from church, she was gone- but we couldn't figure out where she went, until we saw a trap door. I don't know when this part was but I also remember that David and I were setting up a camper in our camp spot, and then my family showed up and they were sad that we were there too - I was trying to surprise them, but they didn't want us around. :( I aldo remember kinda waking in and out of the dream, but I continued to be worried about the bear - there was just a stressful and insettling feeling about the whole thing.

So... here is a little bit about what DreamMoods.com says about the significance of specific items in my dream. DreamMoods is a dream interpretation site that I really enjoy.
Camping: To dream that you are camping, indicates a need for relaxation and a long-deserved break. You need to be more in touch with nature and go back to a more basic and simpler life. Alternatively, it refers to your social circle and support group. You are looking for a sense of belonging, but at the same time be self-sufficient and independent.

Cabin: To see or dream that you are in a wood cabin, indicates that you will succeed via your own means. It suggests that you are self-reliant and independent, yet still remain humble. You prefer the simpler things in life.

Bear: To see a bear in your dream, symbolizes independence, the cycle of life, death and renewal. It may signal of period of introspection and thinking. The dream may also be a pun on "bare". Perhaps you need to bare your soul and let everything out into the open. To dream that you are being pursued or attacked by a bear, denotes aggression, overwhelming obstacles and competition. You may find yourself in a threatening situation. To see a polar bear in your dream, signifies a reawakening.

Locked Doors: To dream that the doors are closed or locked, signify opportunities that are denied and not available to you or that you have missed out on. Something or someone is blocking your progress. It also symbolizes the ending of a phase or project. In particular, if you are outside the locked door, then it suggests that you are having some anti-social tendencies. If you are inside the locked door, then it represents harsh lessons that need to be learned.
To dream that you are locking doors, suggests that you are closing yourself off from others. You are hesitant in letting others in and revealing your feelings. It is indicative of some fear and low self-worth. If someone slams the door in your face, indicates that you are feeling shut out or some activity or that you are being ignored.

Car Accident: To dream of a car accident, symbolizes your emotional state. You may be harboring deep anxieties and fears. Are you "driving" yourself too hard? This dream may tell you to slow down before you hit disaster. You need to rethink or re-plan your course of actions and set yourself on a better path.

Escape: To dream that you escape from jail or some place of confinement, signifies your need to escape from a restrictive situation or attitude. Alternatively, it suggests that you are refusing to face your problems. You are avoiding the situation, instead of confronting them.
To dream that you escape from injury, from an animal, or from any situation, signifies your good health and prosperity. You will experience a favorable turn of events.

Camper: To dream that you are living in a camper, indicates that you need to move on with regards to some aspect of your life. You may be dwelling on a situation and it is time to move forward. Alternatively, you may be expressing your desire to be more independent and self-sufficient.

Surprise: To dream that you are pleasantly surprised, indicates that you are opened in acknowledging and confronting your unconscious feelings. To dream that you are unpleasantly surprised, suggests fear of the unexpected and unknown. You do not want to face your feelings.
  • I can agree with the camping part. I could use a "real" break. :)
  • I like the cabin part. :) I was confused in my dream - because it was an old wood cabin, but it had the one drywalled wall that the polar bear's hole was in, kinda a flapped corner. - "To dream that you demolish or break down a wall, indicates that you are breaking through obstacles and overcoming your limitations. It also means that you desire some freedom and independence. If you see a wall crumble, then it suggests that you have easily risen above your problems and overcame your barriers." Again I didn't break the wall - but it was really messed up.
  • How wild is it that it specificly lists a polar bear? reawakening. Wow! And there was the mommy bear who was agressive, but seemed to be able to sneek around.
  • Ok, so I was closing and locking the bear out, meaning: ? I'm not sharing my feelings about obstacals or competition. ???
  • We weren't in the car accident, I just know that it was something slowing us down from getting to where we were going - knowledge that was important, shutting down lanes of traffic, but I didn't ever see the actual accident (I don't think?)
  • I didn't escape - the bear did?
  • We were setting up a very specific camper - felt kinda like the tent in Harry Potter - was normal on the outside, but much larger and spacious on the inside, almost a full house.
  • I wasn't the one being surprised, but I was trying to surprise my family - they were unplesently surprised. - maybe I am afraid of the unexpected from my family or what they think. ???

Thoughts? Post here or email me. :)

Thursday, June 18, 2009

David Update

Hi Everyone,

As most of you know, David has been sick for a couple of days (since Saturda) with a high fever & mild body aches. Unfortunaltely, it's not the flu... His high fever comes back after Tylenol and Advil ware off, and yes we have been to the doctor, more than once in fact!

We just got back from the doc again today, and hopefully with more blood tests - they'll be able to figure out what's going on. We are both sick of this ridiculous mystery illness, and have new found respect for our family and friends that have had to go through much worse than our own 5 days of sickness. We again went to the doctor this morning & after haning out there a few hours.... they are still are not sure what's going on. We are jumping through all the hoops, so I am sure we'll find out something soon. Tomorrow we go back in, this time to an infecious desease specialitst. David is pretty freaked out about that, so all your thoughts and many prayers - will be much appreciated, we are hoping that they come up with something "normal" and nothing too serious or long term. It could possibly be Mono or even West Nile- but both normally have many other symptoms as well, so that's why they aren't sure until the blood tests come back.

Today we had to put in a short term disapility claim since he has missed the full week of work, and has been written a note for the rest of the week. His bosses have been very understanding & wishing him well. I've also missed a few days of work, in order to take him to his appointments & take care of him once we are home. Today I went if for a short time & am hoping that they are just as understanding as UPS has been with David.

Anyhow, figured a written update is easiest, instead of calling everyone seperatly. :) Thanks again for all your prayers! please keep them coming! :)

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Starting Points by Luci Swindoll

Starting Points by Luci Swindoll

Do you travel? I do! A lot! And there are certain things I have to take on every trip. Ive learned first to work on the knownscosmetics, underwear, medications, pajamas, and night-light (I never travel without a night-light). Then I move to clothes, shoes, and accessories, depending on the season, engagement, and destination. It finally comes down to a science. Starting with what I know (in any dilemma) is helpful and will ultimately get the job done.

Starting points of any endeavor can be debilitating. We dont want to start something because it seems too hard, too involved, and too much work. Whether its writing a term paper, building a house, saving money, losing weight, or packing for a trip, we dont know where to beginso we dont.

Lifes highway is littered with people who had good intentions but never punched the start button. I know a few people like this, and their questions are always the same: How did you do that? How do you always finish projects? How did you plan that far-fetched vacation to that out-of-the-way spot? The answer to each of these is the samestart. Nobody has the key to the outcome, but we all have the key to possibility. Open the door and walk through it.

Excerpted from Life! Celebrate It copyright ©2006 Luci Swindoll. Published by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used with permission. All Rights Reserved.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Annoyed, at myself

Why am I my own worst emeny?
Why do I dream of things I can not possess?
What attacks are these?

These thoughts are oppressing, they are silented by my voice.
These words that won't be uttered, yet grow louder than they seem.
It's not that they aren't truth, but more that they are not welcomed.
Not right among us, not ready for them to be loose.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Searching out my S.T.O.R.Y

So reading last night sparked some thoughts - I was reading Cure for the Common Life by Max Lucado. I really love how his writtings can speak to me, I want to someday be a writer like that.
Him and Beth Moore! Pow! Their words can drop me to the floor. :) Anyhow! Last night, we were looking at how each of us are created completely unquie and that we each have a S.T.O.R.Y to figure out. I only got as far as STO - :) Strengths, Topic & Optimal Situations.

Humm.... quite hard to think of huh!? :) (will continue to update later)

Friday, May 29, 2009

Actual Rule or more just guidelines ???

I am finding it more and more important to know and search out where exactly are my life rules, and where do they come from? - What I mean is character, integrity... How to act? what to say? What NOT to say!?! You know simple things that our parents used to teach us - play nice, share, don't lie.... now seem to be obsolete in the adult world and I just can't figure out why!



My interest has peaked recently as I see more and more people in leadership, that should know better, continue to slip up on these simple little rules of childhood. However, I am seeing that maybe since they never seem to have a guilty conscious about things, they just simply don't have any rules to live by - they are more just guidelines! as we are told in the popular movie "Pirates of the Caribbean" by Captain Barbosa.

The definition of a rule per Merriam-Webster is as follows :

Rule (noun) 1 a: a prescribed guide for conduct or action b: the laws or regulations prescribed by the founder of a religious order for observance by its members c: an accepted procedure, custom, or habit d (1): a usually written order or direction made by a court regulating court practice or the action of parties (2): a legal precept or doctrine e: a regulation or bylaw governing procedure or controlling conduct

Guideline (noun) : a line by which one is guided: as a: a cord or rope to aid a passer over a difficult point or to permit retracing a course b: an indication or outline of policy or conduct

As you can see the words and definition language is very different from each other. So as I have been continually seeing such double standards and two faced talking - I just don't get it! And now, even our President is doing it . Who does this surprise? Not me unfortunately, not me.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Conviction- If this isn't I don't know what is.

1 John 1:5 - 10
Living in the Light
5 This is the message we heard from Jesus[c] and now declare to you: God is light, and there is no darkness in him at all. 6 So we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness; we are not practicing the truth. 7 But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin.
8 If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. 9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. 10 If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Thoughtful Words

Be who you are
and say what you feel,
because those who mind don't matter
and those who matter don't mind.
- Dr. Seuss

Friday, March 6, 2009

I agree

I never knew an office supply site would have such good articles! :)
http://morsescode.quill.com/blogs/penpal/archive/2009/03/01/admin-s-assistant-mar-09.aspx Normally all things we all think we know, but this is so important & it was great to have a reminder to smile & look nice. Because it does kinda make you nice. :)

http://morsescode.quill.com/blogs/officeliving/archive/2009/02/01/the-welcome-mat-feb-9.aspx I think I am going to have a goal of cutting flowers each week from my garden this year. My roses were amazing & I hardly trimed them, I need to enjoy them more! :)

Hope one or both are helpful for you.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Speak up, why don't cha!

I have had a head cold the last four/five days. I have been doped up on meds & sleeping in my free time. I hate head colds. I get frustrated that things just don't make sense to me, or that I completely forget what I was working on or thinking about just a minute before. Ok, so I do that one anyhow, but you can understand it gets much worse with a stuffed head.

Anyhow, today couldn't be more clear. As time is slowly passing at work today, I was thinking about what I want to accomplish this year. Making a few health & business goals, I realized that I have been talking, planning all these same goals for about two years now. And still in the same place so far, nothing has happened. So trying to re-focus and continuing to clean my desk off, I read a one page devotional - it has my favorite Psalm in it - Psalm 46:10 Be still and know that I am God. The devotional talks about being still enough to hear God, to be present with him & willing to listen. - Yeah, cool. Sounds good, I mark the page, and put it away.

I pickup my Mary Kay inspirational desk calendar - flip to Jan 8 - and read today's page designated to Dreams.
God would not give us a dream without the ability to achieve it. Winning begins when you throw away your pride and "go for broke." When you aim at something that's bigger than you're sure you could ever achieve, and then you practice believing and seeing yourself achieve that goal. Act as if you have already achieved it. In other words, "fake it 'til you make it."
Huh? Ok! Now, you may not think that these words are as powerful by themselves, and that's fine neither did I - they were powerful, because minutes ago, I had just wrote an email - talking about that I haven't "went all in" - that I haven't really tried. - "going for broke." Wow, that really hit me, I have heard it. I know what he's trying to show me. I haven't, but I CAN!
I have so many things that I try to shoot for, so many goals within a year, but I think I am really going to try and focus on just two or three really big ones this year! and I can do it!
God is behind me, he is inspiring me and encouraging me. Wow, how lucky I am! How great this year is going to be! when I start listening to him and letting him guide my pace and my steps!

It should be a DOGs life!

Emailed from my cousin Sue

A Dog's Purpose (from a 6-year-old) Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle. I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home. As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience. The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker 's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away. The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives. Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ''I know why.'' Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try and live. He said,''People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?'' The Six-year-old continued,''Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.''

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.
Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy.
Take naps.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.
Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.
On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Be loyal.
Never pretend to be something you're not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.
ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY!

2009 Tips Taken

These tips are from Zen Habits, a great blog that I try to read whenever I can. Here are his tips & my responses as follows:

Tip 1) Don’t make resolutions, create a new habit. It lasts longer. Try the New Year’s Challenge.
Response 1) My new personal habit is health. I will plan and choose what I put into by body; I will move joyously to have a better and thinner life.

Tip 2) Start your New Year with a clear desk. Clear everything off the top of the desk but the essential tools.
Response 2) Ok, ok - still need to do.

Tip 3) Set one major goal for this year. Focus yourself completely into making it happen. Make it a mantra.
Response 3) I will plan and choose what I do for my body.

Tip 4) Take action TODAY to make your One Goal happen. Even a small action. Tomorrow: repeat.
Response 4) one small action? I will not eat out today and I will plan lunch and dinner.

Tip 5) Schedule time for yourself, right now. Every day if possible, even if it’s just 10 mins.
Response 5) Ok, I will plan to blog for myself everyday, first thing in the morning, when I get into the office.

Tip 6) Practice effective focus. Spend 30 minutes just focusing on one task. Clear distractions. It gets easier.
Response 6) Yes, I agree this is a great thing to do. I will work with blocks of time & 6 most tasks.

Tip 7) Realize that you don’t need to respond to email right away-no one expects you to. It can wait! Checking email just twice a day is possible if you let go of the need to respond immediately.
Response 7) Yes, again I agree - but I also feel loaded down, when I don't get them answered & then they get lost. I will have to get better at this & plan time to email and return calls in my day.

I will have 4 different goals this year, one for each quarter. This first quarter I am focusing on health & fitness. And I have also joined the New Year's Challenge & refocused on sparkpeople.com - along with following & listening to Julia Havey's Life Changer Program, this is the year that my life and body will recreate it's self. This will be well worth the pain.