Cute!

LOL - I love it!

Wobbly Weekend

Weekend was so fast - and so not productive like I would have prefered. I don't feel rested, I don't feel like I "got ahead" of anything. But I do feel like Monday is going well. So.... I'll take it.

I need my FRIENDS!

This really made me feel good this week, an email shared by a friend . :)

I just finished taking an evening class at Stanford. The last lecture was on the mind-body connection--the relationship between stress and disease. The speaker (head of psychiatry
at Stanford) said, among other things, that one of the best things that a man could do for
his health is to be married to a woman whereas for a woman, one of the best things she
could do for her health was to nurture her relationships with her girlfriends. At first
everyone laughed, but he was serious.

Women connect with each other differently and provide support systems that help each other to deal with stress and difficult life experiences. Physically this quality "girlfriend time" helps us to create more serotonin--a neurotransmitter that helps combat depression and can create a general feeling of well being. Women share feelings whereas men often form relationships around activities. They rarely sit down with a buddy and talk about how they feel about certain things or how their personal lives are going. Jobs? Yes. Sports? Yes. Cars? Yes. Fishing, hunting, golf? Yes. But their feelings? --rarely. Women do it all of the time.

We share from our souls with our sisters, and evidently that is very good for our health.
He said that spending time with a friend is just as important to our general health as
jogging or working out at a gym. There's a tendency to think that when we are "exercising" we are doing something good for our bodies, but when we are hanging out with friends, we are wasting our time and should be more productively engaged--not true. In fact, he said that failure to create and maintain quality personal relationships with other humans is as dangerous to our physical health as smoking! So every time you hang out to schmooze with a gal pal, just pat
yourself on the back and congratulate yourself for doing something good for your health!
We are indeed very very lucky. Sooooo let's toast to our friendship with our girlfriends.
Evidently it's very good for our health.

Rules of Engagement

Ugggghhhhhh - I hate following the rules. And what do I even hate more than following someone else's rules? Making my own to follow.... (sigh) So when I was directed to sit down and make my own "rules of engagement" when it comes to communication and conflict, I just shuttered. But why do I have to do this? I don't wanna!

I guess, mainly because there is a much nicer feeling that comes with "I'll try" or "maybe"

then a set of Rules,

made by Myself

to follow - for the bettering of myself being understood

or even for something much more important: my marriage.

Reading this today: "Pretty soon your mate started to slip off your lofty pedestal, and you off theirs. The forced closeness of marriage began stripping away your public facades, exposing your private problems and secret habits. Welcome to fallen humanity."

That's heavy, I do feel that way, - but I still don't want to create rules that I have to follow and he doesn't. Ok, I am being selfish, so I keep reading: " don't think living (this) will drive all conflict from your marriage. Instead, this is about dealing with conflict in such a way that you come out healthier on the other side.
Both of you. Together."

I still don't wanna, mainly because I don't like to admit to myself when I fall - it hurts, it's hard to be disappointed in yourself and feel set up for failure. But I'll do it. Whew! This is really hard for me, I want you to know. :) I'll do it.

Since there are two types of boundaries that I've been asked to create, "We" and "Me", and since my husband and I haven't had this conversation (mainly because I don't know how to bring it up) I will only work on the Me Boundaries today.

• I will not mention divorce like it is part of our future.
• I will not lie to David.
• I will not look for zingers to hurt David.
• I will not fight in public with him.
• I will not let myself off the hook and blow up.
• I will not hit or strike in a harmful way.
• I will not talk before I pray and listen.
• I will not yell and scream.

All of this kind feels really negative, so let me re-phrase them.

• I will talk and remind us both of the long future that our marriage has, and celebrating our anniversaries together with joy!
• I will speak only in truth.
• I will speak kindly and in love at all times.
• I will let things go when we are in public, and politely ask that we re-visit that issue when we are alone.
• I will control my feelings and stay calm.
• I will touch only in love and affection.
• I will listen first, and pray to my God before speaking.
• I will speak gently and keep my voice down.

I have made my rules and I will play by them for "If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand." Mark 3:25

Have I ever really listened ?

Sunday's sermon at North Metro always gives us a few notes to dig deeper with ....

Today's is pretty rough,

Deeper Still Lifeway Blog- Recap

http://blogs.lifeway.com/blog/womenallaccess/

Another woman's recap, from Lifeway.

Deeper Still, Denver CO

Oh my, I don't know if I can find the right words to describe the Deeper Still women's conferance this past weekend in Denver, but I loved it! I heard so much, I learned so much, I hurt so much, I loved so much, I sang so much, I praised so much, but I thankfully didn't buy so much! :) Over the next few weeks, I will be unloading some of my notes and thoughts, but until I have the time to do that here is a video that shows what Deeper Still was about in a nut shell.



Deeper Still - Denver CO from Rich Kalonick on Vimeo.

My Heart is Still Breaking Today

You Pick Me Up

Father God, Every time that he crushes me, rolls me over to hurt my underside - Lord lift me up!

Somehow I feel like everytime he gets a chance David is rude to me, ignores me, makes zigger comments - and I am trying so hard to keep loving. Even though he is not filling me up, Lord! I know you will! I know you want to Father, and I want you to also. Lord, give me the patience and focus to get through this day succesfully Lord. Let me thrive in your presence, let me dance in your glory.

Lord pick me up while we twirl.....